Have Mercy on Me

Yesterday things didn’t go as planned.

At all.

I had a 22 mile training ride and we embarked up the mountain. I thought that climb up little mare would be the hardest part- but continuing onward out of trappers lodge the next few miles were a tangled mess that I had to hike through and saw our way through at a snails pace. Slow and frustrating.

When finally we came off the mountain I settled into enjoying all the wealth of pink azaleas that were thicker than I’d ever seen and decided to just be glad all that was behind me. I kept hearing this whisper, this voice reminding me that God delights in you, he calls you: my delight is in her (Isaiah 62) look at all this beauty today!

We hit lime kiln road and now just 10 miles of gravel. Smooth sailing!

4 miles down the road out of nowhere K stumbles slightly then in a slow motion moment which was actually like 1 second probably she’s all the way down and scraping the road. I roll off her and when I turn around she stands and my heart sinks as I see the blood pouring from her wounded legs. One of the cuts was really deep on her front knee.

I check my phone. No signal. Still 6 miles to the trailer. I haven’t seen a soul all day nor did I expect to and this is normal for us out here in the wilderness. I didn’t even know what I needed. I just needed help. In that moment an odd thing happened. The only words I had were not ones I would have thought. But I began to repeat them over and over out loud.

Son of David have mercy on me.

In less than 2 minutes from the wreck I heard it. A sound coming up the trail. It was a group of men off road motorcycling (from NY to TN). They stopped and immediately went into to helping me.

Two went back and got my trailer. One had a full first aid kit and I was able to wrap the gushing wounds. When they got back with my trailer they followed at a distance behind me to make sure I got to pavement safely.

Then I was able to call a neighbor who is a local nurse and has horses and she was home. She helped me clean and bandage the wounds and said nothing else could be done, but she will heal. And I’m fine. A scrape on my elbow.

I am fascinated at how loud the message of Gods love for me was on this very day that a scary difficult thing came. Did he was to be sure I didn’t forget in the trauma of the moment? Like someone you love knowing that rough seas are ahead and saying: don’t forget! No matter what! I love you!

Or is it more like whenever beauty and light are strong darkness does all it can to disrupt and come against it. There is a real battle going on in our world, under the surface in unseen places. There are forces of good and evil that are not random or just an impersonal universal force. This whole day seemed very very personal to me. Both for good and for disruption. The more I pay attention the more obvious it becomes around me.

I would have loved to avoid my horse getting hurt. In 7 years of riding her mostly alone and often in remote places and having to do some sketchy things on occasion to navigate something unexpected… this is the first serious thing that has happened. I don’t believe it was luck those guys showed up. As I acknowledged the inconvenience of their day to help me, one said: well it’s ok. Sometimes God places you exactly in the right place. We are glad we can help you.

Indeed. He (God) knew it would happen that way. I’ve considered the questions… could it have been avoided? Did I do something wrong? I don’t carry a full first aid kit when I ride. It’s not a bad idea but this thing I really needed was way bigger than the small thing I would have carried if I even had one.

What about the discussions I’ve read lately about people not wanting to share the trails with bikers – forget where you might find an off-road motorcycle gang coming around the corner… yet far from being my downfall these men saved me and my horse.

Why didn’t God just stop it from happening?

That I don’t know.

However I do live in a way that I believe he turns everything for my good. It doesn’t look so good in some ways. I have a clinic this coming weekend that I don’t know how I’ll be able to participate now. Does someone else need my spot? Do I need to work on mental things that aren’t what I had in mind? Or will these wounds heal in a miraculous way?

What about the OD50? I had big plans for that? I can’t do any more training- I have her enclosed in a small pen she can’t even run the field for now. That seems unlikely she’ll be strong and healed to run 50 hard miles with these wounds. Maybe I need to go serve the needs of others instead and find the joy in that while my horse heals. Maybe this is for me to learn more deeply to set my own goals aside and remember that I also wrote on my dream card last July: help others achieve their dreams!

Then I also wonder… just how many things does God prevent from happening every day? It’s easy to ask why did you let this one thing happen but what about thanking for all the protection I don’t even know about.

At the moment I’m disappointed on the one hand, but deeply grateful on the other hand. The rescue that came as I called is unmistakably the hand of God for his daughter. Random luck is just not that good- I don’t have that kind of faith.

Maybe he wanted a moment to show me just how much he loves and cares for us.

My horse will heal. And anyone who knows me will already hear me saying:

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

Romans‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Yes. Even this.